Living with Flexibility

Dr. Wayne W. Dyer, internationally known author and speaker in the field of self-development, wrote a book called change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life—Living the Wisdom of the Tao in which he has written essays on the ancient wisdom of Lao-tzu.  The essay on the 22nd verse deals with “Living with Flexibility.”  Dyer says, “Having lived by the ocean for years, I've observed the beauty and majesty of the tall palm trees that grow at the water's edge, often measuring 30 or 40 feet in height.  These stately giants are able to withstand the enormous pressure that hurricane-force winds bring as they blow at speeds up to 200 miles per hour.  Thousands of other trees in the huge storms' paths are uprooted and destroyed, while the stately palms remain fixed in their rooted selves, proudly holding sway over their otherwise decimated domain.  So what is the palm trees' secret to staying in one piece?  The answer is flexibility.  They bend almost down to the ground at times, and it's that very ability that allows them to remain unbroken.”

Living without flexibility in the way we act and see the world leaves us at a disadvantage.  Trying to control everything never works out in the long run.  We all know people who are rigid and set in their ways who cannot bend or budge.  I imagine that each of us have times when we are that way ourselves.  The Tao suggests that nurturing flexibility helps us to withstand the storms of life and remain open to all possibilities.  If you imagine yourself as a tall, stately palm tree—the wisdom of the Tao would say: When criticism comes, listen.  When powerful forces push you in any direction, bow rather than fight, lean rather than break.  When you live from the perspective of being able to say, “I don't know for certain, but I'm willing to listen,” you become a person whom others identify with because your flexibility lets them see that their point of view is welcome.  Let go of having to win an argument and being right by changing the atmosphere with a statement such as, “I've never considered that point of view.  Thank you for sharing your ideas with me.”  In this way you give everyone permission to relax their rigidity because you have no need to prove yourself or make others wrong.  Let us live the wisdom of the Tao by being flexible in the way we act and see the world.

Author Info: Peggy Roberts

Chaplain Peggy Roberts is Vice President of the spiritual life Department here at Beatitudes. Peggy was ordained in the Presbyterian Church (USA) and has served in pastoral ministry as well as being a hospice chaplain.