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Category: Spiritual Life

Extroverted Love, Introspectively Known

Fri, November 15, 2019 Published by

Do you recharge by being social with others, or by spending time alone? Perhaps you are a person to enjoy conversations with a large group of people, or perhaps you prefer one-on-one interactions? Would you describe yourself as an introvert, or as an extrovert? Whether we are happiest out partying with our extroverted friends whom we have only just met, or whether that thought fills our introverted souls with dread, most of us can certainly say where, on that scale, we find ourselves most comfortable. With that in mind, I was fascinated to read recently about an introvert who deliberately lived, for a week in the most socially extroverted way possible, saying yes to every social engagement she could. The prospect, she said, was ‘as appealing as root canal treatment’. Her behavior was a sociological experiment prompted by research from the University of California in which over a hundred people were asked to act as extroverts for a week, and then as introverts the following week. During her week of extroversion, this intrepid introvert made new and lasting connections with others whom she perhaps otherwise wouldn’t have – and she described the process as ‘fake it till you make it’. There was nothing fake about the connections that she made with her now new friends, but her comments reminded me of a piece of Confucian wisdom which invites us to try acting ‘as if’ something were the case in order to bring about that which we seek. For example, if we are naturally introverted, acting ‘as if’ we were extroverted can playfully and courageously break up patterns of normality and expectation, and help us to see that different ways are possible. It’s practical advice that could just work in any walk of life, and you have to try it, of course, to see the results. Within a faith context, imagine for a moment not just believing in an abstract sense that God loves you unconditionally, but to act intentionally so as to shape all of our interactions and the challenges which we face with that knowledge at the forefront of our minds, watching for what happens when we let go of trying to prove our own worth, and resting instead in the reality of God’s complete love for each of us. Faith can seem like a beautiful idea which is one step removed from the reality of our lives; but living purposefully, while acting as if God’s kingdom of love can be found on earth, as it is in heaven can be a daring way of bringing the reality of that faith about.

Standing and Staring

Tue, October 8, 2019 Published by

As the fierce heat as waned and Summer has begun its gradual change into Fall, we have all received a reminder that despite living in metropolitan Phoenix, where at first glance our environment and surroundings seem so controlled and ordered, the unending cycle of our natural world continues on in the background without any management or administration from us.

Despite us liking to think that we have subjected every aspect of our world to our own whim and desire, the natural world has a habit of prodding us every now and then, and reminding us that humankind, despite its opinion of itself, is merely a part of something much larger.

Anyone who has been out at sea when a storm is heading toward them will be quick to tell you that no matter how much we might want to, ultimately we do not have control over everything in our lives.

A lack of control is often a difficult thing- we all like to manage and govern as many aspects of our lives as we can, but what happens when we come face-to-face with something which we cannot control? Then we hit a problem. Despite our society offering us control and innumerable choices in our lives, there are still those things over which we have little or no choice.

That is why for me, those nudges from nature are so important. They help to remind me that I have to remain open to the ungovernable aspects of my life, and not to get so caught up in my own life as to forget that I am only a small part of something much bigger. The Welsh poet, W. H. Davies, encapsulated this reminder in his poetry:

What is this life if, full of care,
We have no time to stand and stare?
No time to stand beneath the boughs,
And stare as long as sheep and cows:
No time to see, when woods we pass,
Where squirrels hide their nuts in grass:
No time to see, in broad daylight,
Streams full of stars, like skies at night:
No time to turn at Beauty’s glance,
And watch her feet, how they can dance:
No time to wait till her mouth can
Enrich that smile her eyes began?
A poor life this if, full of care,
We have no time to stand and stare.

Perhaps by simply standing and staring we might also remember some other words, this time from the 14th century mystic, Julian of Norwich, who wrote that despite our worry and fear when we lose control, with faith in God “All shall be well, and all shall be well and all manner of thing shall be well”.

An Invitation to Harmony

Fri, August 23, 2019 Published by

Question:
Why do people gather to sing together?
Why do they find such joy in this activity?
Why do Beatitudes Choir members get so excited when they hear there’s another singing opportunity for them?

Answer:
It’s all about HARMONY!

Recently, Beatitudes Campus offered a Tuesday afternoon Hymn-Sing which featured the chance for all to enjoy singing some of their favorite hymns, to hear the Beatitudes Choir perform one of their successful hymn-tune arrangements from the recent season, and to top it all off by enjoying a time of social mixing and root beer floats! While all of these factors made for a lovely Tuesday afternoon, (especially those cool delicious root beer floats on a very hot August day), what the Beatitudes Choir members found MOST appealing was the opportunity to sing together. Not just “singing,” but singing in HARMONY. The incomparable Webster suggests in his dictionary that the word Harmony is a “tuneful sound”, a “pleasing or congruent arrangement of parts”, but even more “correspondence, accord, internal calm; Tranquility.”

Yes, as singers fill their lungs with air, and release that air through vibrating vocal cords in tuneful sonorities, they achieve a pleasing sound to their ears. Even more, they release happy beta-endorphins in their brains, and peace and tranquility begin to settle inside them.

Furthermore, after they’ve sung together for a period of time, they begin to appreciate the spirit of the personalities singing around them, and they begin to feel a “harmony” of spiritual being with their fellow singers.

Thus, it is with great joy, that the singers of the Beatitudes Choir invite those of you who love music and who can sing in tune, to come and join them in Choir this Fall. To achieve their uniquely harmonious tones, the Choir gathers together to rehearse 3 Tuesdays a month, then shares the beauty of their harmony with their fellow residents by singing at the 3:00PM Sunday Service in the Life Center on the last Sunday of every month. The first rehearsal of the upcoming Fall season will be held Tuesday, Sept. 10th from 3:30 to 4:30PM in the 2nd Floor Lobby of Central Park West. In this welcoming and friendly space, equipped with comfortable chairs and a baby grand piano, Director, Ellen Brown, leads the choir through vocal warm-ups designed to strengthen and increase their vocal range and breath-control. Then selections are carefully rehearsed for the next Vespers, at which they will sing.

Repertoire is carefully chosen to bring out the best that the singers have to offer, showcasing a wide variety of styles and composers: some fast, some slow, some very serious in nature, some with a touch of light-heartedness to them. In the time span of one hour, singers would agree that, although they may arrive at rehearsal in all sorts of conditions, invariably they leave feeling that at least for a sweet hour of time, their lives have been eased into harmony, in a most delightful way, through the sharing of The Gift of Music.

You’re invited: Do come and share this special Gift! Feel the Harmony! You’ll be glad you did! Call the Spiritual Life Department with any questions at x18465.

From Little Acorns

Mon, August 12, 2019 Published by

Each of us has had at least one individual in our lives who has helped to shape us into the person we are today. Perhaps for you it was a particular teacher, colleague, friend or relation? I consider myself fortunate to have had a variety of such people who have guided me along my way, and recently I have been thinking about one such person, who probably has no idea of his influence upon me.

At eighteen, I left home for my undergraduate studies in Theology at the University of Chester and while there I became a regular worshiper at the cathedral in that same city. The cathedral had six resident priests who, in rotation, would preach and officiate during worship, all of whom I got to know well. One of those six was Fr. Trevor Dennis. Trevor is one of the finest Hebrew Bible scholars I have encountered, with a wonderful gift for poetry and expression which I encountered over the years in his sermons, his published works, and in conversations over cups of tea. He is a member of the select band of preachers whose sermons I can remember for longer than a few days after I have heard them! But importantly for me, at a time when I needed it, and without knowing he was doing so, Trevor challenged me to live deeper into my faith, and helped me to grow in my understanding of how God was at work in my life. I still have books of his poetry and translation on my study shelves, and turn to them regularly. Look at how he begins the introduction to one of those books;

“God is familiar, well known and very close, yet so many these days do not feel the warmth of his embrace… how then to convey that mystery and the familiarity? That is the question and task facing anyone who would dare speak of God”.

With hindsight, it is clear that Trevor became one of those people who I can say has shaped me, and despite not having seen or spoken with Trevor for many years, he continues to challenge me and guide my ministry as I read his words and remember our conversations years later.  

God moves in mysterious ways. Trevor would agree with that, and he would probably agree that God moving through him was one of the most mysterious ways of all.

May we all be open to God working through those around us. May we all be open to God working us. May our eyes and ears be open to those who surprise us and challenge us, and, in turn, may we all grow in faith, understanding and love.

The Blame Game

Sun, July 14, 2019 Published by

The Rev. Brad Munroe, the Executive Presbyter of the local denominational body of which I am a part (part of the Presbyterian Church U.S.A), has rewritten the Serenity Prayer for the 21st Century. 

God, grant me the serenity to accept that others
may misunderstand, misinterpret, and misjudge
my motives when hearing the narratives I speak,
the courage to listen with grace, humility, and compassion
for other’s motives when hearing the narratives they speak,
and the wisdom to know when to speak and when to listen,
always seeking charity, clarity, and conviction from all.

In a recent article, Brad writes about the Fundamental Attribution Error (FAR) which is a term psychologists use to describe the phenomena of attributing ill motives to others while assuming pure motives for oneself. For example, if someone cuts us off while driving, our first thought might be “What a jerk!” Conversely, consider the last time you were suddenly honked at for drifting into a different lane.  You may have had an immediate alibi (e.g. the sun was in my eyes, my kids were distracting me) that explained your behavior based on a situation.  You didn’t immediately come to the conclusion that you were an inconsiderate or incompetent driver. Because of the Fundamental Attribution Error, we tend to believe that others do bad things because they are bad people. We’re inclined to ignore situational factors that might have played a role. 

A particularly common example is the self-serving bias, which is the tendency to attribute our successes to ourselves, and our failures to others and the situation. You might have noticed yourself making self-serving attributions at times. How often do we judge others harshly while letting ourselves off the hook at the same time by rationalizing our own unethical behavior? The Fundamental Attribution Error is so pervasive that I guarantee you will see it in action over the next week if you keep your eyes open.   If we were to add up how many times the FAR is made in the meetings we attend, the gatherings we go to, the conversations with family and friends, we would likely find reasons why our life together needs an injection of “the courage to listen with grace, humility, and compassion.”

Some helpful remedies and things to consider are:  watch out when you make generalizations and don’t be too quick to draw conclusions about the character and capabilities of others, assume the good will of the other person, and envision yourself in the shoes of the other person and imagine their challenges. Unquestionably, there are genuine jerks and incompetent people we run across in life.  Given our inherent tendency to ascribe negative traits quickly, we will be better off by considering alternate explanations before we jump to conclusions.  Those folks that are truly deserving of negative labels will have ample opportunity to validate our suspicions!

Lost and Found Again

Mon, July 8, 2019 Published by

This past week I read about an international research project conducted by Science Magazine. Hundreds of “lost” wallets containing large and small amounts of money were placed in locations around the world where they could easily be found, with the aim of the experiment being to see what would happen next. Would one nation be more honest than another? Would a particular age demographic be more honest than another? Would anybody turn in any of the wallets at all? Well the results have been surprising to read. Fascinatingly, the study revealed that the more money there was contained in a lost wallet- the more likely it was to be handed in to the fictitious owner, whose contact details were also left inside. For those of you wondering, Switzerland had the highest overall wallet return rates. China had the lowest, and the U.S. ranked around the middle of the 40 countries, at 21st place.

The project reminded me of those various parables that Jesus told about things being lost. Jesus’ teaching using allegorical stories is recorded in all four gospel texts, including stories about lost sheep, lost coins and lost children, with his intent and focus being to help us to understand the joy of God in the lost being found, and the rejoicing in heaven over those who find true fulfillment and joy in their lives by living fully into a relationship of faith and love with God.

According to the Science Magazine study, and contrary to what many might suppose, it would appear that civic honesty is still alive and well. It’s easy to be despondent about a perceived decline in what one might refer to as neighborliness and honesty, but the research certainly suggests that, when it comes to our society, all is not lost. And as we read in Jesus’ parables about the enduring and boundless love of God, it becomes clear that neither are we. May all who walk the pilgrimage of faith, and who search for meaning and purpose find voice for our hearts desire in the words of Martin Luther King’s favorite hymn; “Precious Lord, take my hand, lead me on, help me stand. I’m tired, I’m weak, I’m alone. Through the storm, through the night lead me on to the light, take my hand precious Lord, lead me home.” May all those who feel lost find a home amidst God’s love.

Come to the Quiet

Tue, June 18, 2019 Published by

Sometimes we don’t realize how noisy our world is until we escape to a place of quiet.  The Desert Mothers and Fathers believed that silence and quiet prevents us from being suffocated by our wordy and noisy world.  They believed that there is more to silence than not speaking; it is more than the absence of sound.  It is that space we create within, that portable cell, of rest and peace that can stay with us wherever we go.  Madeleine L’Engle wrote a book called A Circle of Quiet in which she described how every so often she needed out—away from all those people she loved most in the world in order to regain a sense of proportion.  Her special place was a small brook in a green glade, a circle of quiet: “I go to the brook because I get out of being, out of the essential.  If I sit for awhile, then my impatience, crossness, frustration, are indeed annihilated, and my sense of humor returns.”

Here on the campus we searched a long time for that circle of quiet, that place to gather thoughts and create that space to help us regain perspective.  Thanks to the inspiration and persistence of some of our residents, we created such a space but it remains yet undiscovered by many.  Irene Cool has helped shepherd the creation of our Quiet Place and I share with you her invitation to visit it.

“Come to the Quiet, Bring Thoughts That You Gather.  This is our Quiet Place at the east-side front of the Life Center and across from Ms. Kimberly’s office. It is there for you and me and all others to go to be still, away and alone or with another. It is there for us to pray, say or simply listen. Our room is there for us to rejoice, to sing, to weep but mostly to just be somewhere and away…from noise, from chatter…a free place to speculate or fret.  Fragrance fills the silence and helps to call on memories and allows our imaginations of happy times and remembrances of comforting places. Soft aromas can calm, purify our souls and heal our bodies.

The fountain of running water, a gentle mantra, assures us of the power of life…a continuum. A great purifier calms our anxieties.  Candles may be seen as a focal point for silence and we can increase our focus and concentration by simple candle gazing…to be mesmerized. The Himalayan salt lamp gives off a soft pink light which brings again the peace of the room to the soul.  So all of you who live here, caregivers and others…when you will sometime want a minute to rest…come to the quiet and find your peace.”

Living with Flexibility

Sun, June 2, 2019 Published by

Dr. Wayne W. Dyer, internationally known author and speaker in the field of self-development, wrote a book called Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life—Living the Wisdom of the Tao in which he has written essays on the ancient wisdom of Lao-tzu.  The essay on the 22nd verse deals with “Living with Flexibility.”  Dyer says, “Having lived by the ocean for years, I’ve observed the beauty and majesty of the tall palm trees that grow at the water’s edge, often measuring 30 or 40 feet in height.  These stately giants are able to withstand the enormous pressure that hurricane-force winds bring as they blow at speeds up to 200 miles per hour.  Thousands of other trees in the huge storms’ paths are uprooted and destroyed, while the stately palms remain fixed in their rooted selves, proudly holding sway over their otherwise decimated domain.  So what is the palm trees’ secret to staying in one piece?  The answer is flexibility.  They bend almost down to the ground at times, and it’s that very ability that allows them to remain unbroken.”

Living without flexibility in the way we act and see the world leaves us at a disadvantage.  Trying to control everything never works out in the long run.  We all know people who are rigid and set in their ways who cannot bend or budge.  I imagine that each of us have times when we are that way ourselves.  The Tao suggests that nurturing flexibility helps us to withstand the storms of life and remain open to all possibilities.  If you imagine yourself as a tall, stately palm tree—the wisdom of the Tao would say: When criticism comes, listen.  When powerful forces push you in any direction, bow rather than fight, lean rather than break.  When you live from the perspective of being able to say, “I don’t know for certain, but I’m willing to listen,” you become a person whom others identify with because your flexibility lets them see that their point of view is welcome.  Let go of having to win an argument and being right by changing the atmosphere with a statement such as, “I’ve never considered that point of view.  Thank you for sharing your ideas with me.”  In this way you give everyone permission to relax their rigidity because you have no need to prove yourself or make others wrong.  Let us live the wisdom of the Tao by being flexible in the way we act and see the world.

Big Tech, Big Brother and a Bigger God

Sun, May 26, 2019 Published by

George Orwell’s novel, 1984, was so successful at creating an imagined yet potential future reality that seventy years later, one of its most famous phrases ‘Big Brother is watching you’, continues to be used when describing the potential for governments and business to use technology to intrude into our daily lives via technology. This past week, that phrase was used by many journalists writing about another breach of technological security. This time, the text messaging service WhatsApp had been hacked by people who had installed spyware, turning users’ cell phones into a surveillance system by activating its camera and microphone, tracking users movements and extracting information from messages that were sent. As Orwell envisioned, that potential in the hands of those seeking to cause harm or to control others has some very serious consequences and implications. If someone hacked my phone, I suspect the most interesting thing they would find would be my wife and I discussing our dinner plans, but the incident is another reminder of how much we value our privacy. Technology has created a double bind. It facilitates communication to an amazing degree. We can send a message to anyone, anywhere, anytime. But it seems to be coming with an increase in surveillance that makes private communication risky. What are we to do? Throw away the phone and return to sending letters with the Pony Express? I hope not. In Psalm 139, traditionally attributed to King David, we hear a half-complaint and half-rejoicing in the truth that he is unable to escape the omniscient God. ‘Where can I hide from your spirit?’ he asks. He answers his own question by saying that he can’t and that perhaps it doesn’t matter. He knows that God’s gaze not only penetrates the rock of the cave in which he hides, it sees into his very soul. God is able to read his life, decrypt it end to end. To use a modern idiom, David knows he has been soul-hacked. The idea of being soul-hacked would be appalling if the one knowing the secrets of our hearts was a malignant force out to mine the data of our lives and use the information for their own ends to crush and oppress us. But as the Psalmist goes on to say: ‘Your eyes have seen my unformed substance.’ ‘Created my inmost being.’ The God who cracks the encryption of our hearts, created that heart and gives us the code to open it. The One who is watching us, in this instance, is not against us but for us.

One Wild and Precious Life

Mon, May 20, 2019 Published by

Much-loved poet, Mary Oliver, died recently at her home in Florida at the age of 83. She lived for many years in Provincetown, Mass., with the love of her life, the photographer Molly Malone Cook. Oliver got a lot of her ideas for poems during long walks — a habit she developed as a kid growing up in rural Ohio. She wrote about one such walk in her poem “The Summer Day”:

Who made the world?

Who made the swan, and the black bear?

Who made the grasshopper?

This grasshopper, I mean-

the one who has flung herself out of the grass,

the one who is eating sugar out of my hand,

who is moving her jaws back and forth instead of up and down-

who is gazing around with her enormous and complicated eyes.

Now she lifts her pale forearms and thoroughly washes her face.

Now she snaps her wings open, and floats away.

I don’t know exactly what a prayer is.

I do know how to pay attention, how to fall down

into the grass, how to kneel down in the grass,

how to be idle and blessed, how to stroll through the fields,

which is what I have been doing all day.

Tell me, what else should I have done?

Doesn’t everything die at last, and too soon?

Tell me, what is it you plan to do

with your one wild and precious life?

A friend of Oliver’s described her as “a visionary poet, and she’s also the quintessential tough old broad who finds traces of awe in, for example, scooping out the shining wet pink bladder of a codfish, or getting down on all fours with her dog out in the woods and, for an hour or so … see[ing] the world from the level of the grasses.”  What I particularly appreciate about Mary Oliver is that she knew the rewards of paying attention.  As Jesus encouraged, she seriously considered the lilies of the field how they grow. Her essay called “Staying Alive,” is about escaping from her difficult childhood into nature and literature.  Her work speaks directly to us as human beings in lines such as: “Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?” In her poem, When Death Comes, she beautifully says, “When it’s over, I want to say all my life I was a bride married to amazement.” Writer Ruth Franklin says her work is infused with a deep spirituality. “The way she writes these poems that feel like prayers, she channels the voice of somebody who it seems might possibly have access to God. I think her work does give a sense of someone who is in tune with the deepest mysteries of the universe.”  As we move into the dog days of summer, I look forward to reading more of Mary Oliver.  What will you be reading?

The Songs We Are Called to Sing

Mon, May 13, 2019 Published by

Later this month, the parliament of Uganda is due to debate, and potentially pass, proposed laws designed to censor some of the country’s most prominent artists. The proposed regulations include vetting new songs, videos and film scripts prior to their release.  Musicians, producers, promoters, filmmakers and all other artists will also have to register with the government and obtain a license that can be revoked for a range of violations. Not surprisingly, the proposals have been condemned as an intrusion into artistic freedom, and interestingly, the proposed legislation has inadvertently sparked a global recognition of the actual influence of what they are seeking to restrict. It is nothing new for the arts to make those in positions of power and control feel uncomfortable, and yet the power of what is sung, and what we ourselves sing, is easily overlooked. It can give a voice to our deepest emotions – and it can help shape our whole approach to life. The Old Testament psalms reflect almost every human condition – anger, grief, despair, illness, desertion, betrayal, and often a deep desire to see justice done. But alongside the lament, we also find praise, thanksgiving and celebration. All life is seen in light of a God whose ways might be beyond our recognizing, but who is to be found even in the darkest of our days.

It was this ability to keep on singing about a liberating God which helped sustain many slave communities in this country during the evil of slavery. Their voices blended in harmony to reach out beyond the drudgery and the misery to a promised land ‘Way over Jordan’. The singing encouraged, motivated, and articulated an important truth which these people had grasped, and were eager to declare with robust passion. What song are we called to sing? Are we singing it, or have we been silenced into submission by those who would prefer not to hear? The Ugandan government might succeed for a while in controlling what’s to be sung. But the song of truth won’t be silenced forever. As Sam Cooke wrote; ‘There have been times that I thought I couldn’t last for long, but now I think I’m able to carry on. It’s been a long, a long time coming but I know a change is gonna come, oh yes it will’. May we all find in God the words to our songs, and the strength to keep singing.

 

On the Other Side of Easter

Sun, April 28, 2019 Published by

Now we are on the other side of Easter. Remember, Easter was not the glorious event for the disciples that it was for us. The trumpets did not sound. Easter lilies and spring flowers did not announce new life in their midst. Unexpectedly, momentarily, they saw Jesus alive and then very quickly he was gone. It had to have been a very uncertain place to be. What happens now? I imagine the disciples were tempted to go back to where they were. They were tempted to go back to who they were. They were tempted to go back to what they were.

I read a meditation during Holy Week that has stuck with me. It keeps challenging my heart and mind. Mary Luti, a longtime seminary educator and pastor writes: “A new command I give you: Love one another as I have loved you…” (John 13:34) It was on the night he was betrayed that Jesus gave us the love commandment. In fact, it was right after his betrayer, flush with silver, left the table and slipped away into the night. Scripture says that Jesus knew where Judas was going. It’s a safe bet the others did, too. Frederick Niedner once wondered whether, after hearing that commandment about the way they should love each other, any of the disciples got up and went after Judas. ‘Did anyone fear for him, miss him, or try, even after he brought soldiers to Gethsemene, to bring him back and talk him out of his shame, his anger, his rapidly deepening hell?’

Did anyone try to love him as Jesus did? Tradition has consigned Judas to a gruesome death and the deepest circle of hell, so my guess would be no. Which means that the church—that’s you and me—hasn’t yet learned the first thing about the love commandment. Or about our own pain. For we all have at least one Judas missing from our tables, out there in the night, unforgiven and alone. And each of us may be a Judas for someone else, absent from someone else’s feast. Maybe when we sit together at the church’s Table to share bread and cup, we should add a chair. And leave it empty, an aching absence. Maybe the sight of that absence would shame us into the world to look high and low for Judas, and to keep looking until all our Judases come home.”

The commandment to love is demanding. How often do we try to make it easy by loving the lovable rather than seeking out those who really push us and make our blood boil? How often have we chosen to continue sitting at the table while a family member leaves in anger out the door instead of getting up and going after them? Who is missing from your table and how do you deal with the aching absence? Who are you wishing would come home? Have you ever been the outcast of the family, the one absent from the feast? Have you ever felt beyond the reach of forgiveness? As a society, who do we leave behind and never go back for? How will you take seriously the love commandment this side of Easter?